Client Case Study: Erin - From “I hate myself” to a strong, present, and proud single mum
Who Erin Was Before Coaching
When Erin first reached out, “healthy” felt like punishment.
She’d spent years chasing smaller numbers on the scale and BMI charts. Healthy meant:
Eating as little as possible
Living on salads and fruit
Being constantly hungry, constantly tired
She’d lost and regained the same weight over and over—
“I would lose 10kg and put on 15kg.”
She’d tried it all: Atkins, keto, caveman/paleo, fruit-and-veg-only, 80/20, minimum calories, shakes, tablets, Isagenix… and hours of cardio because that’s all she knew how to do in the gym.
Underneath all of that?
A messy divorce, domestic violence, and a constant background noise of self-loathing.
“I hated my body. I thought I was ugly, even when I was slim… I was so nasty to myself.”
Life as a Single Mum: No Time, No Energy, No Space
Becoming a single parent changed everything.
She went from sneaking out for runs when her ex had a few wines and couldn’t stop her… to having the kids on her own, nearly all the time.
She went from stay-at-home mum to working.
Daycare pick-ups with overstimulated kids.
Exhausted evenings.
Dinner became:
The kids’ leftovers
Maccas on the way home
Or skipping food, only to binge days later.
Her “consistency” was split between two worlds:
Kid-free time: hyper-disciplined, “good” weeks
Most weeks with kids: chaos, survival mode
And her inner dialogue was brutal:
“I remember walking to the freezer to get more ice cream and Nutella saying over and over in my head, ‘I hate myself, I hate myself, I hate myself’… I was absolutely powerless to the negative voice in my head.”
Even when she did something “good” (like going for a run or losing weight), she’d immediately criticise herself for not doing more.
“I wasn’t once able to celebrate my achievements, because they never felt good enough.”
The Internal Battle: More Than Just Food and Weight
On the surface, weight kept creeping back because she was “failing another diet.”
Underneath, it was:
Chronic stress
Depression and anxiety
Zero structure
Using food as the only comfort she felt she had
“It was depression and anxiety masked as hunger.
I felt like everything was a disaster and not working, so I may as well ‘treat myself’ because I had nothing else.”
Her life revolved around numbing out:
Late nights in bed watching reruns
Scrolling instead of playing with her kids
Shopping instead of going to the beach
Food became both punishment and reward. And the story in her head was always:
“I’m a failure. I’m unworthy. I’m weak. I’ll never change.”
Starting Coaching: Support in the Mess, Not Just the “Good Weeks”
When Erin and I started working together, it wasn’t about a 6-week challenge or a quick-fix shred.
It was about:
Putting actual structure into her chaos
Building a healthier relationship with food
Teaching her how to train for strength, not punishment
Working with her reality as a single mum, not against it
For Erin, the biggest shift wasn’t just the training or the macros, it was having someone there in every phase, not just when she was ticking boxes.
“In a word: life changing.
You weren’t just a support person, you were a cheerleader.
Sometimes it felt like you were literally dragging me out of a hole.”
From the start, she realised this wasn’t about a finish line:
“You made it clear you weren’t just a ‘get to your goals and celebrate’ kind of person, you wanted to change my mindset, change my lifestyle and ensure I was getting the very best out of my life.”
The Clicks (Plural): How Change Actually Happened
There wasn’t one magical “before and after” moment.
Erin describes her journey as “constant clicking”:
Click 1 – Transformation show prep:
Learning what it truly meant to fuel her body, not starve it.Click 2 – Reverse phase:
Realising you can achieve a goal… but you don’t stay there without ongoing work and maintenance.Click 3 & 4 – Injuries:
Understanding she didn’t have to write training off. She could still train what she could (e.g., upper body), to protect both her mental health and identity.Click 5 – Binge eating:
Realising she didn’t need to remove chocolate from her life; she just needed to stop eating the whole block.
“I’m constantly still clicking and I don’t think my clicks will ever be over. I think I’ll keep clicking for the rest of my life.”
This is sustainable change: not perfection, but progressive “clicks” that compound.
Rebuilding Her Relationship With Food
Of everything that changed, Erin says food is the biggest win.
Then:
Food was an emotional crutch.
A spoonful of Nutella meant: “Stuff it, I’ve ruined the day.”
She had no understanding of macros, just “eat less, move more.”
Now:
She prioritises protein, even when she’s not tracking.
She stops when she’s full, not when the plate is empty.
She can have a treat without spiralling.
“Just because I have a spoonful of Nutella, doesn’t mean I have to eat like shit for the rest of the day.”
She still has human moments, ice cream, Maccas, tired nights, but they’re just that: moments, not identity.
Building Systems as a Full-Time Working Single Mum
Over nearly five years, Erin rebuilt her life, not just her body.
Lifestyle & Routine
Stress is still there, but she bounces back faster.
“What used to take me a week to get over now only takes me a day.”
Routine is stronger, even though she works full-time.
The gym has become her happy place.
The sauna is her “luxury reward” that keeps her showing up.
Sleep is better structured (bed before 10 most nights, aiming for 9 pm where possible).
Working Full Time Without Spiralling Backwards
What changed?
She stopped letting one bad meal or missed workout turn into a bad week.
Stronger mental health made planning easier.
Her kids even noticed how much more organised, calm, and present home felt.
Dinners are now cooked, not drive-thru by default (shoutout to the air fryer, too).
Systems for “On Weeks” and “Chaos Weeks”
She scheduled workouts on realistic days, not fantasy ones.
She started small and built up.
She planned basic, doable meals, not Pinterest perfection.
She allowed “simple” options (like a wholemeal muffin with Vegemite) instead of all-or-nothing standards.
“I also allow myself not to make a mountain out of a mole hill. It doesn’t always have to be some amazing extravaganza.”
When the Weight Came Back On: Why She Didn’t Quit This Time
In the past, weight regain meant: “I’ve failed. Start another extreme diet.”
This time, when the scales crept up:
She had a coach who didn’t disappear when things got hard.
She had tools, not just a meal plan.
She stopped calling it “Day 1” and started calling it “just another day on the journey.”
“Just knowing that my coach was always there no matter what…
Didn’t matter if I was tracking or not.
Didn’t matter if I was doing weekly sessions or online check-ins.
Just having someone to always start day 1 with me was helpful and supportive.”
On “can’t train” weeks, she:
Did what she could (a 10-minute treadmill walk instead of skipping entirely).
Trained when she could, not when life was perfect.
Invited her kids to train with her when possible, turning it into quality time, not a conflict.
Results: 28kg Down, But That’s the Least Interesting Part
Over ~18 months of more deliberate, structured change, Erin lost 28kg.
But the real transformation is everything you can’t see in a before/after photo.
“The weight lost is actually the least interesting thing about me and my transformation.”
Physically
She isn’t at her lightest or smallest ever.
She is the fittest, strongest, and healthiest she’s ever been.
She’s back into running, and instead of criticising her pace, she’s proud of herself for showing up.
Mentally
“Omg honestly my brain probably doesn’t even recognise itself.”
She’s the strongest she’s ever been mentally.
She can face challenges without collapsing.
She speaks to herself with compassion and honesty, not hate.
She allows herself to feel emotions instead of numbing out.
Before:
“I hate myself, I hate myself, I hate myself.”
Transition:
“There are things happening outside of my control and I’m doing the best I can.”
Now:
“I’m lucky and blessed to live such a happy life. I’m not always perfect and I don’t need to be. Being where I am, as a single parent, really is a great achievement and I’m proud of that.”
Her Identity Now: Strong, Present, and a Different Kind of Mum
The change she’s proudest of?
“I’m most proud of the parent that I am.”
Because she chose to get healthier:
Her kids see exercise as a normal, non-negotiable part of life.
They move more, scroll less.
They understand that their worth isn’t tied to how they look.
Her pre-teen daughter is learning body neutrality and self-worth through Erin’s example.
She’s also:
Wearing dresses she once thought she’d “never deserve”
Taking on big life challenges
Managing stress with tools, not food
Making new friends—and actually believing she deserves them
Smiling in a way people comment on constantly, because it’s real now
“My smile is big and meaningful and not fake… because I genuinely love what I’m doing.”
The Single Mum Reality (No Sugar-Coating)
Erin is blunt about it:
“People who aren’t single parents do have it easier – it’s just how it is.”
From the outside, some people still see:
“Selfish” for going to the gym
“Wasting money” on memberships and gym clothes
She sees:
Proof that she refuses to abandon herself
A mum who is breaking cycles, not just losing weight
What She Wants Other Women to Know
To herself 4–5 years ago:
“Invest in yourself. Pay the money on your health now because in a few weeks you won’t miss the money – but you’ll have a few weeks of a healthier you under your belt.”
To the woman who feels stuck where she once was:
“Get a coach who is fine with you bringing your kids. Redo your budget and make health a non-negotiable.
And if you’re with someone who doesn’t support your health… he ain’t the one.”
On sustainable weight loss:
“It’s not a 6 week challenge.
I’ve been doing this off and on for YEARS, and people are noticing the change now after big lifestyle shifts 18 months ago.
There are no quick fixes.
Find an intelligent coach and trust the process—
Even if it feels like it’s not working, give it a couple more months.”
Her biggest fears and truths
Lowest fear:
“Being a shit mum and hating myself for the rest of my life and always, always, always obsessing over food.”
Hardest truth she had to face:
“It’s not easy, it’s going to be hard work and it’s not somebody else’s fault.
My choices were mine to make and mine alone.”
Erin’s Chapter Title
If this season of her life was a chapter in a book, she’d call it:
“There can’t be rainbows without the rain.”
She knows she’s in a rainbow phase now, but she’s honest that life will keep evolving:
“It might look easy and glamorous but there are a lot of obstacles I’m pushing through to get to this point. But even though it’s hard, the juice is definitely worth the squeeze.”